Memorial website in the memory of your loved one
The Life Story of Princess Nevaeh Begins xoxo..............
We're Pregnant - 20th July 2006
Found out we were pregnant with Nevaeh.  Yay!!!  It wasn't a planned pregnancy but if we did get pregnant then it would've been a very wanted pregnancy.  So we were pregnant and we were so excited and so happy.  I felt so different from that moment on... xoxo

12 week scan - 1st September 2006
Went for our 12 week scan.  Everything was perfect and we were given a due date of the 8th of March 2007.  My date made me 13 weeks 1 day.  It was so amazing to see our little bub, we had a few tears of happiness xoxo
The worst day in our lives - 12th October 2006
Went for 19 week scan and found out that there was something wrong with our precious little baby.  Still didn't know that she was a girl.  It was so upsetting that the sonogropher didn't even look to see what sex bub was.  There was fluid built up in her tummy area mostly and her heart was enlarged from the pressure of the excess fluid.  The next day we went for another scan to see how serious things were and then we found out our little angel was a precious little girl xoxo

Amnio Test - 16th October 2006
We had an amnio test to see if the problems were caused by a chromosome abnormality.  Results came back all clear a few days later xoxo
Check up & draining of fluid from her tum tum - 24th October 2006
We went into hospital for another check and to see how things were going.  They drained the fluid from her tummy in the hope that this would not refill.  We started to have some hope and had to wait a week and a half to have the scan to see if it had refilled xoxo

An amazing & beautiful moment - 27th October 2006
I had felt movements of bub from around 16 weeks. But once we found out she was a sick little girl I didn't feel as many movements as I would of, had she been well.  A few movements here and there but not often or huge.  But on this night it was so amazing, I really thought she must of been getting better.  She was doing sommersaults inside her cosy little womb.  It was like she was having a gymnastic competition going on in there .  It felt like she was doing flips and then there was a big foot, leg or arm poking out at one stage .  It was just beautiful and so amazing, I loved every minute of it.  I felt so close and connected with her, to actually feel her full on movements inside me.  That was the last time and only time I really felt her move like that xoxo

2nd worst day of our lives - 31st October 2006
Went into hospital earlier to do a blood test to see if problems were caused by a genetic abnormality, which they thought it wouldn't be. While we were there we had a scan to see how things were.  Unfortunately the fluid had refilled and they said she was a very sick little girl and she definitely wouldn't live.  We were then told to decide whether we wanted to end the pregnancy or let nature take its course.  We decided to let nature take its course.  The results came back all clear for any genetic abnormalities in her Mummy and Daddy xoxo

Check up - 10th November 2006
Went in for a check up.  They wanted to keep an eye on me for any signs of pre-eclampsia (toxaemia).  Midwife checked bub's heartbeat with doppler, and she was still with us.  Much to my surprise as I didn't really feel her move very often anymore now that she was getting sicker xoxo

Born into eternal life - 12th October 2006
We think this is the day that Nevaeh left us to go to heaven with her angel friends.  It was the first day since this heart wrenching journey had begun that we went out and had a nice day.  Mummy and Daddy took our puppy Zena to the beach, played with her and got some lunch and sat on the beach and enjoyed lunch together.  That night Daddy had woken up, got up and waved his arms in the air as he could see smoke, there was no smoke in the house.  Not thinking much of it at the time we went back to sleep.  A week after we had Nevaeh, we thought about what had happened.  We believe that is when our little angel left us.  It was as though she had thought, I can go now, Mummy and Daddy have had a nice day together, the first in a very long time since all the stress and heartache began.  The smoke was not smoke, we believe it was her spirit leaving us... xoxox


Our baby girl has gone - 10th-14th November 2006
Nevaeh went to heaven somewhere between the 10th-14th November 2006.  Last heard her heart beating on the 10th November and then she had already left us when we had a scan on the 14th November.  I went in for a check up and we then went in for a scan to see if she was still with us.  I had a feeling that she had already gone and I was prepared for that.  But nothing can really prepare you for the loss of your child even though you know its inevitable.  The sonographer started scanning and I basically could see straight away that her little heart wasn't beating anymore.  I said to the lady (she knew that Nevaeh was dying and there was a possibility she wouldn't be living) before she had said anything to me, ''She's gone hasn't she?'' she said ''Sorry, she has''.  My fetal medicine doctor, Mirade, had come in at that moment also.  It then hit me that my beautiful baby girl had gone and I started crying.  I guess I had always hoped for a miracle and Nevaeh would have gotten better.  My wonderful doctor Mirade started crying also.  I then got up and went to another room to talk with Mirade.  She came in and she had tears in her eyes also.  This meant a lot to me as she would see people lose their babies all the time but she still cried and was touched by Nevaeh.  Nevaeh was an individual, a life, a person, not just another statistic to me.  Mirade was always so lovely at each appointment and so caring and sympathetic.  I'm so thankful for at least having a wonderful doctor like her.  The nurses and even the receptionists were always so lovely. I then went to see where   I'd be giving birth to her in 2 days and then had my pills to be induced.  I then walked back to my car holding in my pain as  I walked past people.  Tears had started swelling in my eyes before I got back to my car.  When I got in the car I started sobbing my heart out.  I had never felt so sorry for myself in my whole life.  But mostly, I felt sorry for my baby girl.  She deserved to be here, she was worthy, she was innocent, she was beautiful, she was MY BABY GIRL!!!  I got myself together and drove home.  I was at comfort having my baby girl inside me for 2 more days xoxo

Meeting our Precious Princess 'Nevaeh' - 16th November 2006
I was induced at 8.30am and started to go into labour around 11.30am.  I had contractions coming every 5 mins at around 2pm.  They continued to get stronger and were coming every minute and lasting for about 30 seconds - a minute.  By about 9.00pm the midwife came in with some sleeping pills to give to me and said she didn't think you'd be coming tonight.  I said I'd wait until 10pm and then I'd see then. The midwife had gone to another ward and said she'd be back in 5mins and didn't think it would happen while she was gone. Well you tricked her didn't you.  At 9.40pm I felt you drop, you were coming and you were coming fast.  I  basically only had time to get on the bed. Another midwife came in and said that you still might not be coming, I was thinking, she's definitely coming! At 9.44pm you were born, Mummy was pretty shocked.  When you were born Aunty Lana said, ''She's beautiful''.  Aunty Elle felt so awful for Mummy, she was overwhelmed with sadness as she felt such sorrow that I had to give birth to my sleeping angel.  Aunty Elle ended up feeling faint during the birth, she said sorry to mummy and sat on the chair.  Then the nurses said she didn't look very good and it was better for her to leave the room.  As she was walking out of the room she then fainted, falling on the ground.  Mummy didn't even know this was going on until after you were born.  She was okay after she had been given a cup of tea and some toast.  Poor Aunty Elle.  We joked about your silly Aunty Elle doing that and said it was because she likes to be the center of attention hahaha Your Daddy & Uncle Phil spent such a long time just looking at you.  Uncle Phil said you were the most special person he had ever met in his entire life and thought you were just so beautiful and so perfect. You were born sleeping peacefully at 24 weeks gestation (6 months) on Thursday November 16, 2006, at 9.44pm, It was truly bittersweet, our daughter was born but not born to stay on earth, she was too precious xoxo Daddy, Uncle Phil, Aunty Elle and Aunty Lana were all there for you...   I am so proud and blessed to be your Mummy!!!
The next day we spent more time with you and took photo's before I left the hospital. It was so hard to think of the things I should have done then as no-one can truly know what to do when they have never been through the loss of a baby.  I wish I had spent more time with you, but at the time I knew that wasn't really you, that you had already left.  I wish I had more photos of you, your hands and your precious little body.  I am so happy and thankful that I have all the photo's of you though and so blessed and thankful I was able to touch, hold and kiss you.  I will forever cherish that as many people aren't even able to have that unfortunately.
I said goodbye to you and left you there, that was soooo hard to do and it pained my heart immensely.  I felt so uncomfortable leaving the hospital.  I hated leaving you there.  I felt awful and I felt so guilty as I was leaving you behind.  Even though I told myself that wasn't really you I still felt this terrible emptiness and guilt for leaving with empty arms.  Knowing that your body was in a cold room all on you're own, was just so hard for mummy.  I felt so lonely from that day on, not sharing my body with you anymore, it was all mine again and I HATED that.  I kept busy by organising your service that was to be held on the Sunday.   I felt like a shadow, all alone, dark, bodyless, and see through, I just felt so empty without you it was awful.  I felt some sort of peace thinking you were with me also.  I continuously looked at the stars and sky thinking of you and missing you every second.  I love you so much my sweet Princess Nevaeh xoxoxoxo


   Now she's wide awake in heaven playing with all her angel baby friends.  Until we get there my baby girl, to hold and love you forever, always & eternity xoxo

Memorial service for Nevaeh - 19th November 2006
We had a memorial service for our precious baby girl at my Mum and Dad's.  Their house is right on the beach and having the service there was so special as we can go there anytime.  We didn't want to have a service for her in a funeral parlour with four walls all around us and in such a depressing place at such a depressing time.  Family and friends came to join us in the celebration of her life and spirit that was now free.  Everything about her service was so special because it was so personal as it was organised by us and not a funeral place.  I had made the service programmes also, it was nice to know that everything was done by her family and friends and not strangers. We played Nevaeh's songs, Angel by Sarah Mclachlan (moment of silence), Somewhere over the rainbow by IZ (while we released pink & white balloons and 3 angel balloons into the heavens to join her). Mummy and Daddy let the balloons go and everyone watched them fly high for so long until they were in the far distance.  They looked so beautiful and that was such a beautiful moment. Then Kissing you by Desree (while the kids blew bubbles for her and everyone scattered pink & white rose petals in the sea) xoxo  Thank you so much to my Mum and Dad and my good friend Elle for all the help to put her service together, we couldn't have done it without you.  Nevaeh's Daddy bought so many bunches of roses and Aunty Elle and Aunty Shannon sat there for soooo long picking all the petals off so carefully, thank you so much also to Aunty Shannon.
And thank you to everyone who came to Nevaeh's service and for the lovely cards and gifts.  It truly meant so much as Nevaeh meant so much to us and always will. Every year on her birthday we will continue to have a little service for her by releasing balloons and throwing petals into the sea for her.  I had also made her a CD which was played throughout her service.  And now family and friends have a copy of it to listen to whenever they like.   They were songs about our baby girl been an angel now and also a few of Mummy and Daddy's favourite songs...

Nevaeh's CD

#1 - Angel by Sarah Mclachlan
#2 - Somewhere Over The Rainbow by IZ
#3 - I'm Kissing You by Desree
#4 - One Sweet Day by Mariah Carey and Boyz II Men
#5 - Together Again by Janet Jackson
#6 - Purple Rain - Prince
#7 - Sailing by Christopher Cross
#8 - Lightening Crash by Live
#9 - I Will Remember You by Sarah Mclachlan
#10 - Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper
#11 - My Immortal by Evanescence
#12 - Keep On Moving by Soul II Soul
#13 - Cherish The Love by Pappa Bear
#14 - Always Be My Baby by Mariah Carey
#15 - Return To Innocence by Enigma
#16 - Hoverphonic (Eden) by Sarah Brightman and Enigma
#17 - Braveheart by Unknown

Nevaeh's due date - 8th March 2007
This was your due date our baby girl   Oh how I wish you were here...  it's just so unfair!!!


Post Mortem results back - March 2007
Post Mortem results back

We found out that Nevaeh had Kidney failure.  They can say that this was most probably caused by a virus.  Viruses pass through our bodies all the time but most of the time they pass on through with no sickness or effect on us.  When women are pregnant the same thing happens and the viruses normally pass through the mother and the baby with no effect.  Unfortunately this wasn't the case with Nevaeh.  This is the most likely cause for her problems.  She contracted a virus which caused her to have kidney failure so it stopped her kidneys from functioning properly.  This caused her to not produce blood properly, which then caused hydrops (excess fluid in her body).  This then caused too much pressure on her heart with the lack of blood and excess fluid.  Therefore causing her to die of heart failure xoxo We are blessed with some explanation of what happened to our baby girl, alot more than some people get unfortunatley...  I really feel for the people that never get any reason's as to why they lost someone so precious to them, just know they were too precious for this world.

Nevaeh's 6 month Angel Birthday - 16th May 2007

Today is your 6 month Angel Birthday!!!
We love you and miss you always my sweet baby girl...


My sweet precious baby daughter it has been 1 year since you left us and now 1 year since you were born, your 1st Birthday!!!
So.......... ''Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Nevaeh, happy birttthhhhhhhdddddaaaayyyy tooooooooo yoooouu!''
Wow I cant believe it has been a year already???!!! It has gone soooo fast but at the same time it has been such a long and tiresome year been here without you my baby girl. I love and miss you more than the first day I was without you and that was the worst sadness and loneliness I had ever felt in my entire life. But now even though I feel this way I have just learnt to live this way because unfortunately, I have to.
If you had of been born around your due date you would have been 8 months old now!!! You would have been sitting, crawling, saying your first words, choosing things you like and dislike, laughing, cuddling, waving and all those sorts of wonderful things... but instead I can only imagine! I wish with all my heart that you were here with us. And you should of been, as what happened to you was just such a random thing to happen and had nothing to do with you or me. Life can be so unfair!!! It has definitely been a hard year, many ups and downs and it just goes to show you can never predict the future can you my baby. All I know is that I love you more than anything and that will never ever change. Having Tyler and then having you have been the most wonderful things to happen to me in my whole entire life and that will forever remain the same.

You're my precious little princess, my baby girl, and no-one can ever take your place in my heart and soul. I am getting your name tattoed on my inner arm with a frangipani flower also (because they are so sweet and smell so beautiful just like you). You make sure you catch your balloons at the beach and also at 9.44pm. There will be so many for you and your friends to play with. I hope you love your cakes, Tyler is going to love eating them for you hehehe... Make sure you're there to blow out your candle out at 9.44pm and bring your friends also to blow there's out to. Well my baby girl I hope you have a wonderful birthday party in heaven and you have loads of fun, lots of yummy food and of course lots of presents to. I know you'll have lots of love sent just for you!!! Stay close my baby girl especially to the one's who need you the most, I would like to have you all to myself but thats just not fair is it :-)....

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